Saturday, May 26, 2007

Parents at sportsgames

Adult behaviour at their children's sport's games is both fascinating and repelling. As I head off to soccer and then netball I will take this advice, with me (although it's not me who really needs it.)

Visiting American sports expert Bob Bigelow has a simple message for parents readying themselves to bark instructions from the sidelines this morning: "shut up".

I am one of the quieter parents confining my sporadic outbursts to to "Go, Go!" when a goal is imminent or "Get in there!" when my daughter seems to have momentarily forgotten she is on a field along with a ball and goalposts.

But there are plenty, a majority, of parents who do exactly what bothers Bob Bigelow. Sometimes when a child does register an instruction aimed at them, they stand stock still trying to process it. I notice that the "enthusiasm " of a parent can be inversely proportionate to the success of the child - although by no means always.

Then there is the PC dilemma (when isn't there one when it comes to being a parent today?) Should I be yelling encouragement for other children as much as my own? Post game, should I heap glowing praise on each and every member despite some clearly being better performers? You can end up monitoring your own performance as much as the players. So I've given up trying.

But maybe I should start screaming my lungs out. Because the $10 "reward" for scoring a goal isn't working. Or hasn't worked so far. In Sam's case, however, I suspect barracking would be as effective as bribery. Not at all.

She's having a great time though. The whole team are - nearly as good a time as their rowdy parents, warm and dry and full of running on the sidelines.

2 comments:

Berend de Boer said...

Part of the game is parents being involved, so shouting is good. As long as you don't try to be the coach. So indeed, don't try to direct the kids.

If you just stand their and watch in silence, I bet there's not much spirit either.

Anonymous said...

I help coach an U12 rugby team and am also involved in managing Junior rep rugby. I have found that after three years of doing this, I have heard only a couple of "bad comments" from the sidelines. Both times the person involved was spoken to and told to watch themselves or they would be banned from junior fixtures. In our grades, the coaches get together at the start of the season and define what is and isn't acceptable. We all know each other and are working to produce good rugby players who may have a shot at representative football for our region. Of course, we all want our teams to win and we reinforce that with a lot of shouting, yelling and cajoling from the sidelines. I don;t have a problem with it from parents as long as they are fair, not abusive or overly aggressive.

Brian Smaller